being a heroine/hero in your own story

Painting by Rob Gonsalves

I'm a romantic, through and through. However, as much as I love the classic story of a princess being swept off her feet by a knight in shining armour, my daydreams are often filled with my own goals - flourishing in a creative career where I am not only making a difference in the lives of others, but waking up in the morning with a grin because I'm doing something I know I was meant to do. 

In speaking with a dear friend of mine, the subject of heartbreak has come up quite often. I think everyone experiences some form of it, to an extent. I, for one, don't think my heart has ever been truly broken romantically, more so a little weather-beaten, with tiny little bruises that have slowly healed themselves over time. Throughout this year, I'll admit, there have been times when I have questioned my relationship status and my romantic life. Why on earth has nothing has happened yet? These relationships had potential, I'd think to myself. Why have they withered away into nothing, leaving me confused and a little flustered? No matter what happens however, the sun still rises and sets each day, regardless of unrequited love, and there's nothing stopping you from doing the same.

Today I thought I would share a few of my thoughts on this. Though I'm only 18 (almost 19, okay!) and my story has really only just begun, this is what I've learnt so far. 

1. Keep busy. My friend Marilyn has reminded me to pursue my dreams no matter what, focussing on bettering myself and sharing my gifts and talents with the world, emphasising the fact that love will makes its way into my life naturally, just by me being in the right place and right time and if it's meant to be. I guess this point is about remembering what you're good at, and focussing profusely on it, because the other good things will come when they are supposed to.

2. Be inspired.  Read exciting books, go on adventures, learn and create. On Saturday I went out dancing, dressed up with my friends and had a lovely time wearing a pretty dress and twirling to Elvis Presley and Billy Holiday. As eloquently stated by Helen Keller, "No pessimist ever discovered the secret of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new doorway for the human spirit". 

3. Listen to good advice. My Mother, and others (from the book How to be Parisian by Sophie Mas) on love and life:
"If he's the right horse, he'll come back at a gallop".
"Be financially independent, so that you love only for love"
"Love alone is not enough. You have to work at it".
"Love many, trust a few, always paddle your own canoe"
"As a girl thinks, so is she".

4.  Know, share and confide in people. Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice highlights perfectly the result of even the most fleeting look exchanged between two individuals; "A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment". It's so easy to romanticise and idealise situations and people that one can easily be led astray by the workings of imagination, as opposed to reality. Know, share and confide in people instead.

5. Be your own heroine/ hero. Perhaps you are Frodo undergoing a perilous journey to destroy the One Ring, or Anne Shirley, determined to accomplish her dreams of becoming a teacher, it's your novel. In the end, you need to be able to rescue yourself from the likes of snarky individuals, days that simply haven't gone to plan or even the Nazgûl Witch-King, because you never know when a Fellbeast could pop up and get hungry.

I really hope that when I'm an old granny, and technology has progressed to insane levels, I can look back over my blog (if it still exists) and tick off everything I thought I wouldn't be able to achieve or perhaps was too out of reach. Maybe one day someone will pick up my book and say to themselves "Perhaps my adventure will be inspired by Maria Savage's today; perhaps I will move to a big city, learn many new things and fall in love with life, just like she did!".

I hope one day I'm not just my own heroine, but someone else's too.